It rained

Today it's raining; how cruel. Like I didn't need another thing to remind me of... her.

I don't want to say too much, because it might make things even worse than they already are. "Words can hurt more than daggers." But I am writing it, and this is my own personal little journal for everyone to read now isn't it. Or would that be just "all too convenient."If someone wishes to read my thoughts then I openly welcome them to. So why must I watch what I say here? These are my thoughts; memories; feelings. If she cared enough to come here and read it then would I be to blame for something she read?

My memories vividly show me everything I lost. Yes, I lost her.

Yes, I can say too much. I have crossed the line by expressing myself to no one, and everyone. If she reads this then perhaps she will think I'm just some obsessive little demon that she should have never associated herself with. Maybe she still has feelings for me, despite the many times she's turned me down from having her back; maybe she'll read this and finally feel safe enough to be with me again. Or maybe she just won't read this.

Now who is this she I keep mentioning? I could tell my sad little story once more, but what's the point. All you need to know is that she used to be mine. She used to love me, but over time that disappeared. I'm not completely sure why.

August 4th, my first date with her.

August 4th, the first time she kissed me. She kissed me, I didn't imagine that.

August 4th, it rained.